Last Friday evening I enjoyed a much-needed break at a friend’s house. It was a great night. My friend was celebrating her 35th birthday by having a “Favorites” party. SO fun!
The evening went smoothly and I laughed so much I did notice, however, I was observing all the ladies there. I was “checking them out”. I was not judging them I was comparing myself to them.
Here was the situation: We sat in a large circle and handed out our “Favorite” items we brought to share. I was looking across the room at two ladies in particular. It started with admiring their hair, earrings, and outfits, but quickly turned into…”I wish my hair looked like that. I wish I were thin. That outfit wouldn’t look that nice on me. She seems so happy.”
It wasn’t even 10 seconds later that a friend sitting next to me whispered, “Do you ever feel like a broken woman?” Ah. She had been thinking the same thing. There we were. Enjoying an evening out and trapped by comparison. In reality the comparison was taking away our joy.
The trap of comparison is just that, a trap. Once your mind starts down that path it is difficult to find your way out. Here it is, four days later and I still feel icky about me.
Comparison takes away the joy of all that we do have.
Comparison quickly turns to negative-self talk.
Comparison shifts our mental focus to the negative in life.
Comparison is not only a trap, but it is a lie.
When I compare, (when we compare), I am comparing myself to what I see. I am making assumptions about another.
If another woman is thin and well dressed, I am assuming that she is happy with herself. Maybe she isn’t.
If someone’s child is well behaved, I am assuming they always are and that she is a better mother than I am.
If someone’s house is clean and organized, I am assuming it always is and that they have life figured out more than I do.
All this based on what my eyes see…
What do I compare the most?
1) My body
2) My hair
3) My children
4) My spouse
5) My house
Do you compare yourself with others?
What areas do you find yourself comparing the most?
How does comparison affect your state of mind, your sense of peace?
© 2012 Standing on Peace